Saturday, August 15, 2009

4 Years of Crap

This month I celebrate four years of watching horrible movies and writing long badly written posts that people claim are funny about said movies, while at the same time enduring so much pain I'm surprised I haven't checked into some kind of hospital. Well, I did that one time but it had nothing to do with the movies, it was that one night I went out drinking and met a girl...


Usually I do SOMETHING for my anniversaries but this year, cause I got a new job which sucks so much ass they actually EXPECT me to work, I haven't had time to do much. But I got some free time now and I thought I'd pick and choose some of my personal favorite movies and/or reviews that I've done over the years.

First, let's start with the first one that popped on this site when I created it. Prior to creating Invasion of the B Movies, I was doing a project called "Friday Night Video Review" where each Friday I would watch a movie and write about it. Simple. One of those Friday's I took on "Dead Alive" and about a week later I was inspired to start the site, so I drug that review to that site, along with two new reviews "Frogs" and "Inflated". All three movies have a special place in my heart. "Dead Alive" for it's Kung-Fu priest, "Frogs" for it's pre-mustachioed Sam Elliot battling amphebians, and "Inflated" for...well read the review and find out.

Another one of my favorite movies that I've reviewed is "Slugs". God I love that fuckin' movie. The dubbing, the horrible acting, the "Birthday" line, everything. I wish every B-Movie could be "Slugs".

But then I came across "Basket Case" and I fell in love. To show my love, I gave it my first ever five star rating. And it was based on the last 10 minutes of the movies. Those are probably the best 10 minutes in any movie ever.

Pretty much every Mass Invasion we've done was my favorite, only cause my group of friends are pretty funny and it's great to read their take on these movies. If I had to choose a favorite though, one I had fun doing, it was probably "Showgirls". Turns out, there are tons of ways to call a girl a slut.

A neat experiment was the "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band" review, where it wasn't much of a review but transcripts of me and my friends Maria and April riffing the movie. I do wanna do that again but I havne't found the right movie to do it to.

GNFOS. 'Nuff said.

The worst movie that I can think of right now that I've seen and reviewed probably goes to "Las Vegas Blood Bath". It was like an anti-movie. Yeah, I hated "Cabin Fever" "House of the Dead", and "Fear of Clowns" but those did have some kind of story happen, even if it was excuted poorly. But "Blood Bath", man. A whole 30 minute scene of girls eating pizza and watching TV.

I honestly can't think of any more so I'm gonna stop there.

I do wanna thank some people for inspiring me or making the last four years pretty awesome, like:
Albert at The Agony Booth
Andrew at
Odd Todd
Fletch for making me a LAMB
My fiancee Felicia for putting up with me watching these movies for the past four years.
All my Mass Invaders: Adam, Bobbie, April, Maria, Sean, Rachael, and that one French guy who's name I forgot, sorry dude.
And finally, you my readers. You are a quiet bunch but when you decide to be vocal, you say nice things and it makes me feel like I am doing this for some reason other than my sick personal amusement. Let's make year #5 fuckin' awesome, shall we?


Fletch said...

Yeah, I'd noticed your lowered output as of late; here's hoping that you're able to be a giant slacker in the near future. God knows I'd barely get anything blogwise done if I actually just worked at work.

And thanks for the callout! You are one of my best LAMBs, and I don't say that to just anyone. Though weren't you gonna send me a movie recently...?

Jason Soto said...

Yeah I know, Fletch. It's just the post office is nowhere near where I live or work so I gotta make a special trip and sometimes it's a pain to do. I'm working on trying to go today. Hopefully.
Thanks for saying I'm one of the best LAMB's although I dunno what qualifies me for that.

Anonymous said...

As for the not reviewing as much, I, for one, forgive you, though I'm pretty sure you're not seeking forgiveness. My granddad always said "Don't necessarily work hard, work SMART".