Sunday, August 23, 2009
Bad Actor Spotlight: Eli Roth
I really rue the day Quentin Tarantino and Eli Roth became friends. Cause now every Tarantino movie is going to great to me, but I'll be annoyed by the presence of Eli Roth. I didn't care too much for Eli as a director until "Grindhouse" came around and he gave us "Thanksgiving" which was awesome. I hate "Cabin Fever" and both "Hostels", which is how Eli and Q.T became B.F.F's. But now Eli has a role in "Inglorious Basterds" and after seeing that movie today I gotta say this:
IT'S MOTHAFUCKING AWESOME!
But...Eli Roth can't act. Sorry. In "Basterds" he's cast as "The Bear Jew", a big hulking guy who kills Nazi's with a baseball bat. That in it of itself is cool and I liked that portion of the character. Then he had to go and open his mouth. And I felt the urge to jump through the movie screen and slap the shit out of him.
I miss the days when Q.T was friends with Harvey Keitel, Michael Madsen, and Tim Roth cause they could act. I love every movie all four of them did together in any form. This includes "Sin City" which only had one small scene directed by Q.T and none of them was in that one scene.
Maybe I'm a bit harsh on Eli's directing capabilities but I'm sorry, he can not act. Anytime he talks, he sounds like he's whining his lines. I don't even know WHY he was cast as an actor for this movie. Or how for that matter. I'm guessing Eli had some rare print of a 1970's Hong Kong film that Q.T MUST have and this was the only way to get possession of it.
The first I was made aware of Eli's acting was in "Cabin Fever", where he gave himself the bit role of stoner camper Grim. I didn't know this when I first saw "Cabin Fever" but I always thought that guy was a bit off and out of place and now I know why. After giving himself another minor role in "Hostel" as Annoying American #1, he was then cast in the Q.T directed half of "Grindhouse" "Death Proof". I've only seen this once so I don't remember if he was given a name but he was one of the dudes at the bar at the beginning with the group of annoying chicks. Probably can't miss his eyebrows.
And now here he is. Killing Natzees with a baseball bat. I wish this would've went to Michael Madsen. Anyway, Mr. Tarantino, please don't cast Eli Roth in any more roles where he has to talk. If you MUST cast him, cast him as a mute. He is intimidating to look at but that all goes away when he talks. Kind of a shame he was the one that did the thing at the end of "Inglorious Basterd".