Sunday, July 25, 2010

More like Date My BITCH! OH SNAP!



The following I'm about to tell you really happened. As I mentioned on FaceBook if you follow me or this blog/site, it'd be too damn sad if I was making this up. Nonetheless I will be providing screencaps so you can read for yourself what was said.

Before that though, I'll need to start at the beginning because I got some new fans (yay it went up from 5 to 10! I'm in double digits now!) and they possibly don't know any of this.

Some years ago I started doing on The Site reviews for a MTV dating show called "Date My Mom". I wrote about the premise and why I review the episodes here, so if you don't know anything about any of that, read that. I'll wait.

*cough cough*

Oh, welcome back.

Ok, so the first episode I reviewed focused on this guy named Troy. He went on three dates with three mom's willing to pimp out their daughters to get on TV. One of the three focused on this chick named Gina and her Mom Donna. Now I'm quoting from my review, which I quoted from THE EPISODE ITSELF! This was put on BROADCASTED NATIONAL TELEVISION!

So the mom goes on a date with Troy and shares that Gina is a remote control hog and they both sing horribly especially in the shower. I'm watching this, and writing a humorous review on this god awful show so naturally I pick on these things. I imagine people were amused and I went on with my life.

(By the way, this episode is my favorite thing I ever reviewed. I'll tell you why at a later date.)

So flash forward to earlier this week. I'm minding my own business stalking my ex-girlfriends on FaceBook when I get a message. A PERSONAL message. I rarely get those. I click it and read it's from one Gina. And it said the following (Click on pic to read it bigger...that's what she said):



My response was "...holy shit, what???" I had to look up the episode but when I found it I was excited. A real person that was on that show contacted me! I get to uncover some truth! How very journalistic of me!

But I wanted to start small, why blow my load right up front. So I sent a small friendly message back asking just some basic questions. What I had hoped was she would read my questions and friend me on FaceBook, then I'd get to ask her more questions about this exprience she went through. So the first three questions I asked her was this:



I don't see any problem with the questions I asked her there. So I hit submit and waited patiently for her to respond. and by "waited patiently" I mean I looked through her FaceBook pictures. Damn, she's hot.

The next day I got a new message and it was Gina! Sweet! I got my notebook out, opened up my Word, and prepared to write the blog post of a lifetime. This was the last message she sent me:



Well. That was NOT the response I was expecting. I was kinda stunned actually. I mean, what did I do? I was nice and civil throughout the whole thing. Hell, I was nice to her in the review! I didn't say one bad thing about her or her Mom. I said the mom was nice and Gina was hot in a pre-nosejob Ashlee Simpson kinda way. I guess you could find that insulting but I think Ashlee Simpson was hot before her horrible nosejob! So I don't get it. I didn't say anything that wasn't said by her and her mother. I was nice. I was polite. And I agreed with her, that show is pretty horrible. But check it out! She admits it IS scripted!

So as you probably noticed, she found a way to block me from ever contacting her again. Which sucks cause, what the fuck? Why did she say that? The hell is she talking about?

Then it hit me like a ton of cliches. Here I thought someone was being nice and reaching out to me and wanted to let me in on this MTV show. But it turns out after all...she's just a bitch.

Plus, notice how she ends both messages, even the one where she unnecessarily insulted me, with "God Bless". I take this more as a trendy thing to say rather than her being religious and actually believing in God and stuff.

So to wrap up, why am I even bothering writing about any of this now? Well a few reasons:
1. I think the overall thing is amazing and funny.
2. It makes a good story.
3. It proves Date My Mom is scripted and isn't just a fevered dream I have.
4. The real reason, in hopes that Gina will contact me again and tell me what the fuck her deal is and why she insulted me and made false claims against me, THEN does the chicken shit thing and prevents me from contacting her. I COULD sue her but honestly, my lawyer is busy with another case at the moment. But when White Castles settles....you better watch out, Gina Remote Hog!
-Jason

PS: The Itunes thing is bullshit, thankfully. Unless her stage name is...Ke$ha? Could it be???

1 comment:

Adam Blank said...

She should be paying you for keeping the memory of her one moment in the spotlight alive. I had never heard of this cunt before you posted this, and now I know she has a singing career! Can't wait to not listen to that.

Also, who's this God person she keeps talking about? Probably something I'd know if I had watched this episode.

Not to get too nitpicky, but MTV is not broadcast TV. It's cable.