Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Day 14: Exorcist 2: The Heretic

This is a jumbled mess of a movie. I don't think I clearly understood what was happening. I don't even know how to write this. I can just tell you what I did understand and remember seeing it. (As how I'm writing these last reviews a day or so late after watching 4 movies in a row.)

So Linda Blair is all hot now and living in New York with some chick name Sharon. She doesn't remember any of the crap that happened in the first film and is a carefree hot chick. She still gets checked out by some doctors or something to see if maybe the memory is just buried deep in her mind.

Meanwhile Reverend Richard Burton is assigned to figure out what the hell happened to Father Merrin in the first movie. He spends the entire movie looking at things and saying "Pazuzu" over and over again. Apparently Pazuzu was the proper name of the demon that possessed Linda Blair.

Speaking of, she's hooked up to some machine that turns people psychic or something? Cause she was able to get into the mind of a mute autistic and turn something on so she can talk or something.

Richard Burton is now in Africa for some reason, trying to find James Earl Jones, who as a kid was possessed by Pazuzu. This all happened in the Exorcist prequel, which sucks on it's own. Anyway, Merrin helped young James Earl Jones out and now James Earl Jones is some scientist figuring out why locusts do stuff.

Richard Burton comes back and psychically enters Linda's Blair mind, which transplants him into the past and he sees Merrin do the thing on a young James Earl Jones. With an understanding on how Pazuzu works, he and Linda Blair must go back to her old house and do another battle, but Pazuzu tempts everyone like crazy. Might as well have him stand in a doorway saying "Want some caaaake?"

Now I truly don't understand what the fuck's happening. The house is falling apart. Linda Blair is even hotter. People are getting possessed like crazy. Richard Burton does Richard Burton things until it all just stops and the credits roll. Man, I haven't been this confused in a long ass time.

Yeah, this movie is really terrible. It's like Poltergeist 2 in that it only exists to explain what happened in the first movie. It's more scarier when you have no idea what's going on. I mean she was possessed, what more do you want? All the stuff with young Marrin was boring and I think unneeded. I can do without this movie.

-Jason

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