Friday, August 08, 2008

Five For Friday: August 8th

Hey! It's 8/8/08! What a lucky day or something? I dunno. I just know the olympics start tonight which means TV is gonna suck for the next two weeks. Guess what I'll be doing with my nights? No besides that. Yes. That. Anyway, onto the Five for this week.

1. Now the REAL Trilogy Is Complete-
Released this week on DVD is Starship Troopers 3. I haven't seen the first two. I know, I haven't seen one of the classic bad movies out there, I'm working on it, ok? Usually when I ask why another sequel was made to some crap movie, the usual answer is "cause of money". But did Starship Troopers AND it's sequel really make that much? Let's go see.
According to, Starship Troopers made $22,058,773 opening weekend, with a gross of $54,700,065 in the U.S. There's no info on it's sequel cause it was direct to video (unless Google is a piece of shit and can't find the info for me. Grr Google.) So let's just say that out of all the people that paid all that money to see it in theaters, maybe half liked it enough to check out the sequel so...doing some math...carry the one...add for some pie...and I get, oh lets say, 500,000 dollars U.S. Compare THAT to The Dark Knight which is at 393,751,065 only after three weeks, and still getting larger...I'm gonna say my final answer is:
No. This sequel did NOT need to be made.

2. The One Girl In Japan You DON'T Wanna Fuck With-
Just watch this:

And tell me that is NOT the coolest thing ever in the entire fucking world. Just go ahead and try to tell me it's not. I dare you. I double dog dare you, mothafucker! Oops, sorry, turned into Samuel L. Jackson for a minute. My bad.

I saw some previews for the upcoming movie "Mirrors" and was shocked to see Keifer Sutherland is in it. I really hate to say this but I can't picture Keifer as anything BUT Jack Bauer now. Especially since he acts the same in every movie since "24". Like that one movie "The Sentinal" where he was more or less Jack Bauer in movie format, which is funny cause a "24" movie is in the making.
So pretty much "Mirrors" is gonna be Jack Bauer in a horror situation. "DAMMIT! Ghost! Give me my son back!! Or I'll have to shoot you in the kneecaps! DAMMIT!!!"
Oh and how much money you wanna bet this was originally a Japanese/Chinese/whatever else film?
Place your bets! Place your bets! And...oh sorry. You lose. It totally is. Dammit.

4. Spooky LAMB-
Over at the LAMB, everyone picked their top ten horror films and the final ten is listed here. My list is as follows:
The Exorcist
The Thing
Evil Dead 2
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (The Original Tobe Hooper Version)
Sleepaway Camp
Bubba Ho-Tep
I had a hard time with this one cause I didn't know which ones to put where and stuff. Someone listed Basket Case, which I've yet to see. I've heard so much about it so now I just HAVE to check it out. Dammit!

5. Stoners Vs Sisters-
I love that Pineapple Express and Sisterhood of the Yo-Yo Pants Crying In Kleenx 2: This Time They're On The Same Cycle is opening up on the same weekend. Even though I'm sure Dark Knight is still gonna be number one, probably damn near until it's pulled from theaters (in 8 months), it'll still be interesting to see who wins this weekend: stoners or women. Much like a few months back when it was Wanted vs WALL-E (I believe) and WALL-E won that match. I should think to look ahead to see when two completely different films open up and set up a death match to see who comes out on top. That'd be funny.
By the way, screw crying women while eating ice cream! Go see Pineapple Express! Woot!

That's all I wrote. Peace!

1 comment:

Rachel said...

Last year, 7/7/07 (a Saturday) was the most popular to get married.

1. If I thought I could sneak my husband's copies of Starship Troopers 1 & 2 out of the house and mail them to you, I would, just to exorcise the demons from my dvd library. Alas, he would notice, since so few of the movies in said library are "his." The first one really is quite enjoyable in a campy way. I didn't bother with the second one and hopefully he'll never learn of the 3rd.

2. There are no words.

3. Agree. Can't imagine Keifer in anything else. Guess he had to pick up a paycheck somewhere since there was 24 this past season.

4. I skipped this one, b/c horror movies in general aren't my thing. I can't think of 10 I love enough to list them anywhere.

5. I skipped both and contributed to the ever-growing box office total for TDK (in IMAX), which opened opposite Mamma Mia! it's first weekend. Ha! No contest there...or since.