Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Day 13: High Tension

Poor Marie. She's in her friend's parents guest bedroom, furiously masturbating when suddenly a psycho killer (Qu'est-ce que c'est?) shows up at the door, slowly killing each family member one by one. He even gets the dog and the little boy. The only person he leaves is Alex, Marie's (female) friend. Realizing that Marie has to be super ultra quiet, she hides around the house, waiting for the killer to go do something. Marie finds Alex and insures her things will be ok. Except not.

The killer loads Alex, bound and gagged, into a weird metal truck. Marie sneaks in and tries to undo the chains but they're tied to a lock, which needs a key. Thankfully the killer needs gas so he stops at a gas station to fill 'er up. While that's happening, Marie runs in for help but the killer is here to pay. Oh and to slay. (Aren't I clever?)

After another close call of the killer almost finding Marie, he leaves her behind. Marie calls the cops, then takes the murdered gas clerk's car to chase down the killer and save Alex. She rather stupidly stays on his ass, even down some dirt road, but the killer gets smart and starts to push her off the side of the road.

The killer chases her throughout the woods, eventually tricking her so she lets her guard down and tries to kill Marie. Marie, grabbing a post with barbed wire, smacks the shit out of the killer, then suffocating him, finally killing him. Now Marie is free to save Alex.

I'm gonna stop here to say if any of what I just said up above sounds interesting to you and you wish to see how this movie plays out (I did skip a few things here and there), then I'm gonna ask you to stop reading this review right here cause there's a major plot twist that you don't see coming and I don't wanna ruin the experience for you. So just stop, watch the movie, then come back.

If you are still reading this, and you haven't seen the movie, don't get mad. I warned you.

Alex is terrifed and pissed at Marie and for good reason. Marie has what I call "Fight Club" syndrome, where she actually has a split personality and it was MARIE doing all the killings the entire time. All the parts with Marie hiding and crap was just in her mind or something.

Honestly, it's not explained too well, cause for one thing, Marie was new to whatever city this was. So if she's this big serial killer, where'd she'd get the truck from? And the part where the killer was driving and Marie was in the back with Alex, she was interacting with Alex, who was responding back (Mainly by screaming into her gag)so...how was that possible?

Anyway, as I kinda figured from the beginning of the movie Marie is a big lesbo and wants Alex and she snapped cause she was probably dating guys or something. Like I said it's not all explained too well. But when Marie, who thinks she isn't the killer, frees Alex, Alex stabs the shit out of her with a knife. Marie reverts to killer guy and chases after her with a big ass saw thing. The ending totally reminded me of the original "Texas Chainsaw Massacre".

Alex tries to get help but Marie ends up killing the dude and is about to kill her when Alex stabs her with a crow bar. But she survived and is now in a mental institution, still pining for Alex.

So if you made it this far in the review and you did watch the movie, noticed how I skipped the part where the killer was giving himself head with a decapitated head of a girl? If that's really Marie how do you....eh less thought about the better.

I quite liked this movie. Watching it a second time might make it a different experience, knowing the twist n all. And it's a french movie, with the French title "Je m'appelle Sacre Bleu!" Or something. The version I watched was one of those screeners I got a few years ago and I gotta say, seeing bits of it in black and white made it an interesting experience. Maybe I should just hand out copies of my copy to everyone.

-Jason

1 comment:

Wings said...

Nope, this movie was fine until that "twist" ruined it all.

And I put "twist" in quotes, cause really it was a major fuck-up that makes no sense and doesn't work within it's own movie.

I call shenanigas. Not worth ever watching again. Same thing just happened to me upon watching "Funny Game".

Shenanigans.