Tuesday, February 09, 2010

Blaxploitation History Month: Foxy Brown

As far as I can tell, Foxy Brown is just a normal chick who just happens to learn how to kick ass and fire a gun.

The movie starts off with Huggy Bear, or as he's called in the movie "Link" (I guess cause he's looking for Zelda?), walking down a street and a car is following him. Inside the car and two white mafia types. Huggy Link stops at a taco stand where some cops are, knowing the mafia guys won't cause trouble with the cops there. This gives Link time to call his sister Foxy Cleopatra Brown, played by none other than Pam Grier.



Foxy agrees to help Huggy Link and she shows up in the nick of time cause the cops leave and the mafia guys are about to lay the smackdown. Foxy runs over one dude and when another dude jumps on her car, she dumps his ass into the river/lake/ocean. Foxy takes Huggy Link back home with her and he tells her he owes them 20 thousand dollars for a numbers scheme.

Elsewhere in the plot, Foxy's boyfriend Dalton works for the F.B.I and ratted out a whole gang of drug dealers. So now he has to get a new face. Hey look, this movie pre-dates "Face/Off". And leave it to the F.B.I to give this black dude named Dalton a boring white name like Mike Anderson.

Dalton/Mike is released from the hospital and he and Foxy make way with the boinking pretty fast at her place. There, Link spots "Mike" and almost realizes this is Dalton. Probably cause he met him before and knows what he sounds like.

Link realizes turning in Dalton to the drug pushers, the same people that were after Link earlier, would give him a pass of the 20 thousand dollars. The drug dealer's boss is Katherine. Yes, there's a chick nemesis. Only cause the hero of the movie is a chick. And you can't have a dude fighting a chick, right? Right.

So Katherine orders a hit on Dalton and this happens right in front of Foxy, who realizes her own brother caused this. She finds him at Link's girlfriend's house and goes on the funniest rampage I've seen in awhile. Knowing full well this isn't his place, Foxy still goes around and tears up the apartment. When Link gives Foxy Katherine's name and racket (she also runs a prostitution ring, busy gal), Foxy goes into action.

Disguising herself as Misty Cotton, she pretends to be a "model" who wants to do some paid boinking. Katherine accepts the offer and sends her out to "bribe" a judge, so the judge can let go two of Katherine's drug dealers. Foxy is teamed up with Claudia, a chick who doesn't believe in bras.

There's a quick scene that's suppose to tug at the heart strings with Claudia's husband and son (named Jason) show up and beg her to quit Katherine's ho-ring and go to Seattle with them. Katherine's thugs rough them up (Well more her husband than the kid. The mafia isn't THAT evil) and send them packing. This gives Foxy another reason to put a stop to Katherine.

So Claudia and Foxy go to the hotel the judge is at and offer him a three-some. They take his clothes off and pull his underwear off and make fun of his "size" and more or less laugh at him. And there are so many court room puns during this scene, it'll make your head spin.



Eventually, Foxy pushes the judge out in the hotel hallway minus underwear and he runs into an unsuspecting girl. When it looks like the judge is attacking her, an army of librarians comes in and hit him with umbrellas. I'm not making that up.

Foxy agrees to help Claudia by hiding her at Foxy's. But Claudia was getting cabin fever and she finds the closest bar which turns out to be a lesbian bar. The lesbian bartender calls Katherine and reports that Claudia is there and soon her goons are sent to pick her up.

Foxy somehow knew Claudia was there and goes in to get her and I'm not shitting you when I tell you this: FOXY FIGHTS A BAR FULL OF LESBIANS! This movie suddenly became great.



Claudia manages to escape from the goons and I guess make it to the airport to meet her husband and kid cause she's never seen or mentioned again. But the goons manage to capture Foxy. They give her some heroin and send her to "the ranch" which is really a shack where two hillbillies live.

She wakes up in Hooterville and one hillbilly ties her to the bed while the other one rapes her. Yeah, the movie about an overpowering black woman features a scene where she's drugged and raped. Thanks, 1970's! Later, she manages to escape by clawing one dude's eye out with some coat hangers and she burns the other guy.

Katherine hears about this and takes action by sending her goons to kill Huggy Link and his girlfriend. Foxy hears about this and teams up with a street justice gang to fight back. Might be the L.A chapter of the same gang that helped "Shaft".

So now the final fight is about to happen. And guess what? Sid Haig is in this movie. Fuck yeah I love Sid Haig. He plays a hairy airplane pilot who's flying a new shipment of drugs into the country. Foxy flirts with Sid and manages to get on the plane.



Sid flies the plane to the drop off place and while Sid is collecting his money, Foxy, who somehow knows how to operate a plane, manages to drive the plane into some mob guys, shredding them like cheddar. The street gang show up and grab the dude Katherine was boinking and Foxy cuts off his dick and balls.

That night, Foxy shows up at Katherines and gives her the jar full of dick and balls. Then Foxy kills the remaining goons and points the gun at Katherine. She begs to be killed but Foxy says "Uh no, I want you to suffer" and walks out of her house.
AAAANNND END MOVIE!

That is probably the lamest ending ever. Yeah, a dude gets his balls chopped off but Katherine was the head villain here, she should've had something of hers chopped off. Instead she lets her live only to suffer. What's to stop Katherine from forming another mob to go after Foxy. I'm guessing there's a sequel out there.

Despite the ending, this was a pretty damn good movie. Pam Grier is super hot and she shows off the goods a few times. You know that always earns extra points with me. And hey, this movie earns more bonus points from me for having Foxy Brown fight a bar full of lesbians. To quote Huggy Link "She's a whole lotta woman!"

-Jason

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