Tuesday, February 02, 2010

The Razzies 2010

The way some people look forward to the Oscars, I look forward to The Razzies. And they are finally here, my friend! Woo!

So since I've doubled my readership from last year (from 4 to 8!) I'll explain how this goes.

I'll post each category and the nominees. Then I'll Bold the nominess that I THINK will win. I've done this every year since, eh, probably 2005 or so. And....I've been wrong every time. Oh well, it's all about fun.

But things get interactive when I throw a poll up and have YOU pick which movie nominated Worst Picture I should watch. So I'll post that category last.

Also, since it's a new decade, they got three new awards for worst (insert) of the past decade. Ok enough of my blabbering, here we's go!

Worst Actor:
All Three Jonas Brothers
JONAS BROTHERS: THE 3-D CONCERT EXPERIENCE

Will Ferrell
LAND OF THE LOST

Steve Martin
PINK PANTHER 2

Eddie Murphy
IMAGINE THAT


John Travolta
OLD DOGS
(Honestly, I don't see anything wrong with any of the others listed. Yeah, Jonas Brothers but it was a concert film and they were just being themselves singing annoying songs. If it was a fictional movie, it'd be a different thing. As much as I look forward to the Razzies, they tend to annoy me at times.)

Worst Actress:
Beyonce
OBSESSED

Sandra Bullock
ALL ABOUT STEVE

Miley Cyrus
HANNAH MONTANA: THE MOVIE


Megan Fox
JENNIFER’s BODY and TRANSFORMERS: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN

Sarah Jessica Parker
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE MORGANS?
(However, I can nominate Miley for merely existing and for giving us a Hannah Montanna movie.)

Worst Supporting Actor
Billy Ray Cyrus
HANNAH MONTANA: THE MOVIE


Hugh Hefner (as Himself)
MISS MARCH

Robert Pattinson
TWILIGHT SAGA: NEW MOON

Jorma Taccone (as Cha-Ka)
LAND OF THE LOST

Marlon Wayans
G.I. JOE
(I'd love to pick on Twilight, but I know he's not gonna "win". So let's give it to the one person on this list that doesn't belong in the acting world.)

Worst Supporting Actress:
Candice Bergen
BRIDE WARS

Ali Larter
OBSESSED


Sienna Miller
G.I. JOE

Kelly Preston
OLD DOGS

Julie White (as Mom)
TRANNIES, TOO
(Obsessed just looks like a stupid movie.)

Worst Screen Couple:
Any Two (or More) Jonas Brothers
THE JONAS BROTHERS 3-D CONCERT EXPERIENCE

Sandra Bullock & Bradley Cooper
ALL ABOUT STEVE

Will Ferrell & Any Co-Star,
Creature or “Comic Riff”
LAND OF THE LOST

Shia LaBeouf & EITHER
Megan Fox OR
Any Transformer
TRANSFORMERS: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN


Kristen Stewart & EITHER
Robert Pattinson OR
Taylor Whatz-His-Fang
TWILIGHT SAGA: NEW MOON
(Again, anything involving Twilight isn't gonna win. But I do find "Whatz-His-Fang" funny.)

Worst Remake, Rip-Off, or Sequel:
G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

Land of The Lost

Pink Panther 2
(A Rip-Off of a Sequel to a Remake)

Transformers: Revenge of The Fallen

Twilight Saga: New Moon
(If there is a Bad Movie God, this should sweep the Razzies.)

Worst Director
Michael Bay
TRANNIES, TOO


Walt Becker
OLD DOGS

Brad Silberling
LAND OF THE LOST

Stephen Sommers
G.I. JOE

Phil Traill
ALL ABOUT STEVE
(Yeah you could say it's cause I hate Michael Bay, but honestly, look at the other nominees. Think ANY of them are gonna win this? This is the year of Bay.)

Worst Screenplay:
All About Steve
Screenplay by Kim Barker

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra
Screenplay by Stuart Beattie and David Elliot & Paul Lovett
Based on Hasbro’s G.I. JOE® Characters.

Land of The Lost
Written by Chris Henchy & Dennis McNicholas
Based on Sid & Marty Krofft’s TV Series

Transformers: Revenge of The Fallen
Written by Ehren Kruger & Roberto Orci & Alex Kurtzman
Based on Hasbro’s Transformers Action Figures

Twilight Saga: New Moon
Screenplay by Melissa Rosenberg
Based on the Novel by Stephenie Meyer

(Ok, Twilight should "Win" in this category cause I wouldn't call THAT "writing".)

Worst Picture of the Decade:
Battlefield Earth (2000)
Nominated for 10 RAZZIES® / “Winner” of 8
(Including Worst Drama of Our First 25 Yrs)


Freddy Got Fingered (2001)
Nominated for 9 RAZZIES® / “Winner” of 5

Gigli (2003)
Nominated for 10 RAZZIES® / “Winner” of 7
(Including Worst Comedy of Our First 25 Yrs)

I Know Who Killed Me (2007)
Nominated for 9 RAZZIES® / “Winner” of 8

Swept Away (2002)
Nominated for 9 RAZZIES® / “Winner” of 5
(God, this was tough. I like Freddy Got Fingered, only cause I knew what kind of movie it was going in it. Everything else is terrible. But I went with the one that caused the most pain.)

Worst Actor of the Decade:
Ben Affleck
Nominated for 9 “Achievements,” “Winner” of 2 RAZZIES®
DAREDEVIL, GIGLI, JERSEY GIRL, PAYCHECK,
PEARL HARBOR, SURVIVING CHRISTMAS

Eddie Murphy
Nominated for 12 “Achievements,” “Winner” of 3 RAZZIES®
ADVENTURES of PLUTO NASH, I SPY, IMAGINE THAT,
MEET DAVE, NORBIT, SHOWTIME


Mike Myers
Nominated for 4 “Achievements,” “Winner” of 2 RAZZIES®
CAT IN THE HAT, THE LOVE GURU

Rob Schneider
Nominated for 6 “Achievements,” “Winner” of 1 RAZZIE®
THE ANIMAL, BENCHWARMERS, DEUCE BIGALO: EUROPEAN GIGOLO,
GRANDMA’s BOY, THE HOT CHICK,
I NOW PRONOUNCE YOU CHUCK & LARRY, LITTLE MAN, LITTLE NICKY

John Travolta
Nominated for 6 “Achievements,” “Winner” of 3 RAZZIES®
BATTLEFIELD EARTH, DOMESTIC DISTURBANCE, LUCKY NUMBERS,
OLD DOGS, SWORDFISH
(Eddie Murphy hands down.)

Worst Actress of the Decade:
Mariah Carey
The Single Biggest Individual Vote Getter of the Decade:
70+% of ALL Votes for Worst Actress of 2001
GLITTER

Paris Hilton
Nominated for 5 “Achievements,” “Winner” of 4 RAZZIES®
THE HOTTIE & THE NOTTIE, HOUSE of WHACKS, REPO: THE GENETIC OPERA


Lindsay Lohan
Nominated for 5 “Achievements,” “Winner” of 3 RAZZIES®
HERBIE FULLY LOADED, I KNOW WHO KILLED ME, JUST MY LUCK

Jennifer Lopez
Nominated for 9 “Achievements,” “Winner” of 2 RAZZIES®
ANGEL EYES, ENOUGH, GIGLI, JERSEY GIRL, MAID IN MANHATTAN,
MONSTER-IN-LAW, THE WEDDING PLANNER

Madonna
Nominated for 6 “Achievements,”“Winner” of 4 RAZZIES®
DIE ANOTHER DAY, THE NEXT BEST THING, SWEPT AWAY
(She doesn't deserve to be considered an "actress".)

Worst Picture of 2009:
All About Steve
20th Century-Fox

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra
Paramount / Hasbro

Land of The Lost
Universal

Old Dogs
Disney

Transformers: Revenge of The Fallen
(Aka Trannies, Too)
Dreamworks/Paramount


Oddly enough, for the first time, I seen TWO of these already. And what's with all the "Land of the Lost" hatred? I know Wings didn't like it that much but did EVERYBODY hate it that much? Really? Weird. Anyway, I really think this is the year of Bay.

So vote for which Worst Picture you want me to watch/review. And I'll also watch the one that Won (if it's one I haven't seen.) This will probably be a strange year. With that said, no nominations for 17 Again? My Bloody Valentine 3-D? Paul Blart for cryin' out loud?? (Maybe that was last year. I don't remember.) Oh well. Let the Razzies begin!
-Jason

1 comment:

Wings said...

I voted! :)