Monday, November 08, 2010

Reader's Choice Poll #2: December 10th Review

Man, you people REALLY want me to review "Dumpster Baby". So be it! The December 3rd review shall be "Dumpster Baby"! With that said, let's get into the next week review! Which of these five shall I review?

1. The Evolved-I bought this on a whim a few years ago but I never got around to it. Just a heads up, it's produced THROUGH Troma. I haven't had too much luck with those.
IMDB says: "Dead dogs, foetus burgers and Nazi clown-chefs; something smells fishy in London; and for once it's not Glover's pants. Detective Danny Glover, Scarborough Police's premier dog-napping-ring buster and general fat bastard, arrives in London to help the clinically psychotic Detective Sonny Boy with a little problem: Who is butchering London's dogs? The answer seems obvious at first, it must be Burger Priest; the Pope's Neo-Nazi clown-chef empire: home of the 'Amen with Cheese', a rancid burger made of fingernails, turds and aborted foetii; just don't ask what goes into their 'Nunion Rings'! Detectives Glover and Sonny Boy engage on a covert mission to uncover Burger Priest's dark secret; but even they are unprepared for the true horror and depth of the fast food franchise's depravity. Assisted by Feety, a heroin-addicted foetus, and Ellen Mellon, a New York reporter who also happens to be an animated ventriloquist's doll, they must reveal the Pope's evil plan and shut down Burger Priest for good. Along the way they learn the truth behind London's drug-addled pregnant teenagers and come face to face with the reality of their own sordid addictions. If this isn't enough, there's a third force at work. Something is stalking and killing Burger Priest's Nazi clown-chef army. Something that crawled out of the ocean, hell bent on revenge. A creature so terrifying men dare not speak its name; the semi-evolved shark terror known only as: THE EVOLVED. If only God existed, maybe he could help you."
That was long. (That's what...oh you know.)

2. Forbidden Zone-I've heard a lot about this movie and I think I had it on another poll before.
IMDB says: "A mysterious door in the basement of the Hercules house leads to the Sixth Dimension by way of a gigantic set of intestine. When Frenchy slips through the door, King Fausto falls in love with her. The jealous Queen Doris takes Frenchy prisoner, and it is up to the Hercules family and friend Squeezit Henderson to rescue her."

3. Meet The Feebles-
IMDB says: Heidi, the star of the "Meet The Feebles Variety Hour" discovers her lover Bletch, The Walrus, is cheating on her, and with all the world waiting for the show the assorted co-stars must contend with their own problems. These include drug addiction, extortion, robbery, disease, Drug dealing, and even murder. While this is happening the love between two of the stars is threatened by the devious Trevor the Rat, who wishes to exploit the young starlet for use in his porno movie business."

4. Shark Attack 3: Megalodon-I've raved about this movie in one of my videos. It'd be worth the review, trust me.
IMDB says: "Twenty-four million years ago, Megalodon was a 20 tonne killing machine with a 10 foot gaping bite. When two researchers discover a colossal shark's tooth off the Mexican coast their worst fears surface - the most menacing beast to ever rule the waters is still alive and mercilessly feeding on anything that crosses its path. Now they must hunt the fierce killer and destroy it... before there is no one left to stop its reign of terror!"

5. Suicide Girls Must Die!-I just bought this from Best Buy and it seems interesting.
IMDB says: "When twelve nude models for the infamous begin disappearing from a remote cabin, the calendar video they are shooting becomes the first reality horror movie."

Ok, there ya go! It's up to you, New York readers! Let me know what you want to see reviewed on December 10th. Poll ends on Friday, so vote NOW NOW NOW!

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